I am a creature of many habits.
My favorite part of any vacation is returning home to sleep in my own bed. In forty-nine years I have only relocated my office twice. I have worked with Cathy, my general manager, and Ed, my Chief Financial Officer, for over thirty years. I have lived in the same house for four decades.
You might think, based on the above, that I am opposed to change. That isn’t the case. But every new habit replaces an old habit, and each begins with a discovery that my priorities have changed. I am not unique in this. We all have to make decisions every day based on our priorities. The question we have to ask ourselves is: do we prefer to stick with our old patterns, or are we open to new experiences?
How we answer that question depends on how well we like what we have been doing, and whether or not we are willing, or even eager, to try to improve our lives with something different.
My friend Howard does not like to travel, and for many years he would take a two week vacation to Hawaii, staying in exactly the same room in the same hotel every time. Once, when “his” room was unavailable, he simply stayed home. His wife Marilyn . . . I should say his ex-wife Marilyn . . . now travels frequently, by herself, to many different destinations.
I am not saying that there is any “right” or “wrong” way to deal with change. It’s simply a matter of taste or, to my way of thinking, your own personal priorities.
When I was young my mother overcooked vegetables, and her idea of salad dressing was either plain vinegar or lemon juice. Yuck! I was more than fifty years old before I would consider eating a salad as a main course. At a restaurant recently I enjoyed a side of vegetables that tasted better than the meat entrée.
A number of years ago I read an interview with older men and women in hospice care. They were asked what they regretted most in their lives. As you can guess, none of them wished they had spent more time at the office working. None of their regrets centered on what they had done, even if that ski trip had ended with an injury. All of their regrets were about what they had not done, what they might have missed.
I like the safety of stability in my life. That’s why I have always created a home base to which I can return. I have seldom lived by myself. I enjoy giving and receiving emotional support, and appreciate sharing my life with someone. I enjoy the pleasure of their company.
Shortly after I separated from my first wife I gave a presentation one evening to a group of potential investors. The presentation was quite successful, and yet I was desolate on my drive home because I knew there was no one there with whom I could share my excitement.
What are your priorities? Are they making you happy? Maybe you’d like to put more zest in your life, or connect with a friend you haven’t seen for years. Maybe you’d like to send a gift to someone for no reason at all, or have someone else order for you at your favorite restaurant. Is there something you’ve been longing to do? If so, I encourage you to do it. None of us will be here forever. So don’t let your old habits keep you from bringing the joy of discovery into your life today, tomorrow and every day.
Alan
This morning I met with Lonnie, who has been my personal trainer for more than fifteen years. The most important part of our time together is the half hour or so during which we simply sit and talk. He knows that I prefer to postpone the actual physical exercise.