That’s an impressive anniversary.  It wasn’t mine, though hopefully it will be in about another twenty years.

As a freshman at the University of Southern California in 1957, I met fellow students Joe and Barbara.  He became the Editor in Chief of the Daily Trojan, and Barbara followed him in the same role.  Both enjoyed long, successful careers in journalism, and Joe, now in his early 80’s, still teaches at USC.  This past weekend we attended their 60^th anniversary celebration.

Because of Covid, Daveen and I haven’t appeared at many parties during the past 30 months, but this was one we didn’t want to miss (and our table was partly outside which gave us some comfort).

Sixty years.  As the universe turns, that’s almost nothing.  But for a human lifespan, it’s significant – perhaps 75%.

I value long term relationships.  A new relationship is often fun and exciting, but a relationship of more than half a century has survived the biggest hurdle – the test of time.

This past week we’ve been celebrating long standing relationships.  Daveen and I visited Jill, who now lives in Oregon.  She and I lived together about fifty years ago.  We also connected with John, who was my first real estate investor in the 1970’s.  Nancy and I have been working on writing projects together since we met in a poetry class in the early 1990’s.  Several ACF employees have worked with me for more than thirty years.

Life is like a stream emerging from the mountain tops, flowing to the ocean, accumulating the strength and warmth of friendships along the way, and it is these friendships that provide our lives with connection and meaning.

To Joe and Barbara – I wish you a happy 61^st year.

I hope to continue enjoying our shared journey for many years to come.

Love,

Alan

To keep current on important news, I read the New York Times online every day.  They always feature one lengthy human-interest article.  One story last week was about two elderly Chinese gentlemen who met in a homeless shelter in New York City and became best friends.

As children, my younger brother David and I played together (and fought together).  When mom brought him home from the hospital, I was no longer the center of attention.  Did that bother me?

You bet.  After observing him carefully for a few months I said to Mom, “He doesn’t seem to be useful for anything.  Take him back.”  She ignored my request.

David loved to play ping pong.  Knowing this, I would only agree to play with him if the loser took the winner’s turn washing the dinner dishes.  Since I was older, I usually won. That wasn’t a bad trade-off, I thought, since playing ping pong is far more fun than washing the dishes.

As adults, we became best friends.  David, who was very quick on his feet, was an outstanding trial attorney.  He represented me at one deposition in which he flawlessly shielded me from the unwarranted and intrusive questions of opposing counsel. I still remember feeling extremely grateful to my little brother for his protection. By then I had unequivocally revised my original opinion. He was, in fact, very useful.

Almost twenty years ago he didn’t appear at work, and his office staff asked his ex-wife to check on him.  We had last seen him the weekend before at a 4^th of July party.

Carolyn called me from his house, where she found his body.  Apparently, he died from a totally unexpected heart attack.  He was sixty years old.

I was devastated. For six months, I had trouble functioning.  I have never fully recovered from his loss and haven’t had a male friend that I felt as close to since.

Reading the article in the NY Times reminded me of the importance of friendships. And so, I made a promise to myself to appreciate my friends more fully. We don’t need to wait for Thursday June 8, 2023 (which is Best Friends Day in the United States).

I urge you to hold your friends close.  They may not be around forever.

Alan

The 4^th of July brings back memories of summertime with my mom when my brother and I were young.

Every morning I’d ask, “Mom, what can I do today?”

Often her reply was, “Let’s go to the zoo.”  In those days we could actually interact with some of the animals. I especially liked feeding peanuts to the elephant.

Today, when I’m not working, I still ask myself the same question.

“What can I do today?”

My best answer is to do something that adds value to my life.

What does that mean? Well, it can mean many things to different people.

For me it means I can read something interesting.  Or I can work on a project with someone.  I can write my blog.  I can call a friend.  Today we’re having a small 4^th of July party, which adds value in lots of ways not only for me but also for our guests. Here are some of the ways we will add value to our day:

My family, especially my grandchildren, will enjoy the pool. (Sometimes it’s not easy to get them out).

We’ll share our plans and experiences.  That’s always fun – and fun is one of the best ways to add value to your life.

We’ll eat a meal together.  What could be better than a shared meal?

Daveen just let me know that everyone is starting to eat.  Should I spend another half hour on this blog?

Well, it’s a holiday, it’s time for lunch and I’m hungry.  So, I’ll finish this blog and add value in other ways later.

I hope you did something to “add value” to your life on the 4^th and I encourage you to do the same every day of your life.

Alan