Values From My Dad
My dad passed away more than five years ago, and I’ve finally gotten around to realizing that despite our differences he passed on to me many of his core values about hard work and family.
A century ago my dad’s father emigrated from Ukraine. He supported his family as a piece-work tailor in the sweatshops of New York in the early 1900’s.
I suspect that is why my father practiced diligently to become a professional musician by the time he was 18. No sweatshops for my dad, he worked hard to find his niche and master it and while I suspect he wasn’t a great student otherwise, he became an expert at playing the French Horn.
Not only did Dad earn his living from playing—he also wrote a book, “The Essentials of Brass Playing.” It is still considered one of the best handbooks on brass fundamentals and I believe has been translated into thirteen different languages.
As with other families at that time, ours had certain subjects, such as sex, that we never discussed. That was just understood. But unlike other families, we did talk about money and investment. A lot. At one time Dad successfully invested in the stock market, and personally charted the price and volume information from several hundred publicly listed stocks. It took me twenty years, and significant financial losses, to learn that I do not have the talent or the patience that a successful stock investor must have. But what I learned from father about investing and finances has served me very well my entire life.
There are only two areas where I do not share my father’s views — I never spanked my children, though it was a common practice when I was growing up, and I never insisted that my children “finish everything on their plate,” which was undoubtedly Dad’s remnant from the Great Depression of 1929.
Dad, I just want you to know that I share your values, especially keeping the family together. You and Mom had two children, but now have eighteen descendants (eight grandchildren and ten great-grandchildren.)
Just like it’s never too late to have a happy childhood, it’s never too late to appreciate your parents and the values lessons they passed on to us.
And for the record, my mother was a Saint.
Alan